“Lead with your heart open…. imagine how different we’d all be if we lived with our heart open?” my yoga teacher asked.
I thought… it’d be easier to stab us from the front instead of stabbing us in the back.
Heart openers in yoga are a bitch. They stretch out your chest and your shoulders feel like ripping as your arms move behind you. You feel worse than naked. Exposed for the kill.
The more exposed you are, the easier it is to hurt you. I wondered, how… exposed am I? For starters, my facial expressions leave little mystery. My eyes hold few secrets.
And when someone is hurt. I’d take out my entire heart out for them. See look? It can hurt like yours. You’re not alone… I’d try to convey.
It’s easy for me to open my heart to other people. It’s difficult for me to open my heart up for myself. It’s painful to open myself and say, this is what I feel. This is how shitty it really is. This is the now.
But I must. I must be able to know the contents of my heart. It must be processed. It must be sorted through. It must be addressed. And I must find the strength to keep doing this myself.